What Healthy Couples Know That You Don't

Recovery can be very difficult because of shame. Shame is an obstacle to healing for everybody. How can you face hard truths about your own dark side without drowning in the shame? Partners can learn how to not add to the stranglehold of shame that stomps on the soul of their partner & wiggle up to the wall of denial to restore hope.

Self-awareness is both a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing because it improves who you are down to your very core. It is a curse because it is so hard to do the work of facing up to your own dark side. All of us are so good at pretending we are better than who we are, because it's hard to look at our selfishness, greed, anger or dark side. When someone lacks self-awareness, it is far more difficult to have success in relationships.

Joy is more than fleeting happiness; it's a deeper,sustaining energy that gives our lives vitality and meaning.While happiness often depends on circumstances, joy is something we can cultivate, even amid stress, uncertainty, or conflict. It's the quiet undercurrent that helps us bounce back from hard days and reconnect. The more we allow joy in, the more it softens our relationships. Today we will explore practical ways to expand joy.

Today we're talking about emotional regulation and understanding emotional triggers, and how those two pieces can completely change the way we connect with each other. Communication is the backbone of any healthy relationship—but it's not just what we say, it's how we show up emotionally when we say it. Many of our most challenging conversations aren't actually about the surface issue—like the dishes, the lateness, or the tone. They're about the emotional reactions happening underneath. 

There is an emotional toll to chronic negativity. Constant criticism or defensiveness doesn't just chip away at trust—it creates emotional distance. Partners start protecting themselves rather than reaching for each other, and intimacy suffers. Every couple experiences tension, disagreements, and frustrations, but when negativity becomes the main storyline, love starts to get buried under criticism, defensiveness, and resentments.